Building Friendships That Matter

We all need people in our lives, regardless of how independent we are. When it comes to choosing friends, do you have a set of criteria, or do you let nature take it’s course? If you do have standards, what are they and how do you know you’ve made the right choice?

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Making friends isn’t all about having someone to talk to or spend time with when you’re bored. Your circle of friends defines the person you become eventually and your personality before people.

There’s a popular saying;

Show me your friend and I’ll tell you who you are.

The friends you keep could change you, either for better or for worse. This is why it is really important to have friends that think like you or even better than you. I consider this one of the best ways to determine if a person can truly be your friend and can enable you grow.

I have been with a group of friends at different stages of my life and have learnt alot from each groups I’ve found myself with. Each with a different lesson to teach and something new to learn from the different characters, personalities and different cultures.

I used to be one of those people that just lets nature take it course. But life’s experience has taught me better. Friendships I got into by chance never really worked out. They didn’t end in a bad way per say, we just grew up and discovered we didn’t have the same purpose in life, we didn’t think alike and so didn’t agree on a lot of things.

It took a lot of strength walking away from someone I had bonded so much with. But I took the courage to do it anyways, for my mental health. They’re people, because they got into some friendships by chance are stuck in unhealthy and toxic friendships. I’m sure they’re also people it has worked out for.

I wouldn’t want to say I have standards because it’s sounds a bit proud. But if I’m ever going to look at a person and admire them enough to want to befriend them, then the most important thing for me would be that we think alike. We have the same school of thoughts, even if we don’t agree on everything.

Even the Bible said two or three can not work together unless they be agreed. So why would I want to risk something as important as that to nature or chance. Good friends are rare, and it’s a privilege to have a sincere and true friend who genuinely cares for you.

I’ve honestly made my peace being without a close friend. Now I just keep lots of good people with good energy and the right mindset around me. People that I can achieve things with, grow together, share ideas and genuinely enjoy each others company.

Someone once told me that there’s no point in being friends with someone if you both cannot contribute anything impactful to each other’s lives. I hope people can understand that gossips and chit chats isn’t what makes someone your friend.

If we can take our time to pick our friends the same way we pick our life partners, maybe they’ll be less cases of betrayals that stems from having fake friends.
Who knows?