Conversations With Bud

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Bud: Human. It has come to my attention that you have made an appointment at the local saw bones for us. I have come to discuss the reckless disregard you have for our happiness.
Me: Nothing to negotiate here, Bud. You all need to go for your annual check up at the vet. You and your contingent can move along.
Bud: Excuse me...at our age, there's no need to be manhandled and poked with needles before being unceremoniously sent on our way. I'm speaking on behalf of all canines in this household who deserve to be treated with love and respect and...
Me: Bud. I'll let you in on a secret. Senior dogs don't get shots. Dr. Smith just wants to say "hello" and give you a birthday puppy cookie.
Bud: He does?
Me: You can spend your time hanging out with the unsuspecting pups in the waiting room while Rocky gets his shots.
Bud: I can?
Me: Yep.
Bud: Negotiation over. Senior, you're with me. Idiot Brother, you're on your own.