The other day I was surfing and I found myself complaining to someone how busy it was. He looked at me and said 'well, it's not as busy as summer', stopping my rant immediately. I laughed and apologised, thanking him for the reality check, which we all need sometimes, especially when our fault response to a situation is complaint, crying that it never used to be like this.

The older we get, the more nostalgia bias is real - thanks to @ericvanwalton for this reminder this week - the surf was less crowded, the house prices were cheaper, and you didn't even have to clean up people's plastic bags of dog shit off the beach because not everyone had a fucking dog.

Despite knowing the truth of nostalgia bias, where we believe the past was better even though it may not have been (even if house prices were cheaper, it was harder to afford a house in the '90's, otherwise I would have had a real estate empire), it's easy to slip into the default rant mode. I hate the crowds. I hate that everyone's a surfer now. I hate that everyone brings their dogs to Bunnings and that every dog is a groodle. What happened to mutts and bitsas, the produce of local inbreeding? What happened to difference, when algorithms promote hobbies and likes that we think we are choosing for ourselves?

But, like my readjustment out in the surf, you have to practice the rethink. Is the reality I'm complaining about the truth, or is there another way of looking at it? Do I want to nurture bitterness and discontent or happiness and gratitude? One's going to make you feel poisoned, the other's going to lift your heart. Both are truths of a sort - yes, it's more crowded, but also, if everyone's having fun, what's the harm? Shared joy is a beautiful thing. You can smile and pat the excited kelpie cross poodle running madly on the beach even if it's not on a lead and just jumped up on your clean trousers. One way of thinking might ruin your day, the other might infuse it with happiness.

It may be winter, and it may be cold, but we get the most tremendous skies at this time of year, and beautiful rainbows. Why dwell on one when you can leap with joy at the other?

Still, I'm always going to want to beat dog shit unpickerupperers with a piece of driftwood. Fuck you and your fur baby.