24 years old virgin - my comedy open mic 12 entry

going through puberty was strange for me, one morning you're in the kitchen drinking milk and next morning you're in the shower making milk. Of course going through puberty makes growing up hard Literally to go through without being teased by friends but I always knew how to handle that

Not only am I not getting any, but I think I'm preventing others from getting it too, when I was 17 I had my first girlfriend, 2 weeks later in the relationship I turned her lesbian. Not just any lesbian, like somehow she became the bear kind, it's never a good sign for your manhood when a girl who is one year younger than you that you used to date grows beard and chest hair before you

as time went by I started clinging to a girl who'd promise to date me when they break up with their boyfriends, I think I should probably give up on Gloria now that 5 years passed and she hasn't broke up with the guy, their marriage should have been a sign too, as well as their first born, and second. She's pregnant with a twin now.

But now a girl named Lana is saying she's gonna leave her boyfriend.

Now I'm just stuck in the friend zone like

I guess porn is a good way to go but I'm stuck in Saudi Arabia where it's blocked so I'm stuck with stuff like these

to be honest I don't really care about sex that much but there are times when you really start trying weird stuff to just "load off" the pressure

Really weird stuff

like REALLY weird stuff

like REALLY REALLY weird stuff

I nominate @punchline and @traf since they're the only people I actually follow here.