Dimitri Reacts to Bitcoins

Poor Dimitri has spent the last few years couch hopping like a flea. Barely able to pay for food.
He was so disgusted by the Mt. Gox incident that he never checked his wallet again.
Dimitri finds himself at his favorite bar. But vulture capitalists have taken over the place to celebrate their laughable "gains".
He has spent his last few fiat dollars on a watered down shot of Quervo. (which spilled on the floor when a rich investment banker purposely bumped into him.)
But will the bankers have the last laugh? Or will it be Dimitri?