Valentine’s Day - Do we really need it?
I believe everybody knows what date is today. And what this day means for some people.
Hearts everywhere. Chocolate everywhere. Wallet crying.
And I always ask myself… why exactly do we need one special day for love?
When you are already in a relationship, you show love every day. Or?
I mean… when someone is next to me every single day, I can buy him something anytime. Just because. Not exactly today.
It feels so commercial sometimes. So loud. So “BUY NOW OR YOU DON’T LOVE ENOUGH.”
But wait.
Do you even know how this day actually started? Because sorry… it’s not exactly a cute love story 😉 Okay… maybe half-half. Romantic… but also tragic.
And I’m 100 percent sure if you ask random people why Valentine’s Day exists, you will not get many correct answers.
So let me tell you a little bit about history. Because… why not😉 And...hm...maybe I already told you, not sure 😉
Valentine’s Day actually started in the Roman Empire.
And no… it was not about roses.
There was a festival called Lupercalia. It happened in February. It was loud. Wild. A little crazy. It was about fertility and welcoming spring.
No teddy bears. No pink balloons.
Just ancient chaos.
Romantic level? Zero.
Now we meet the main character... MR. Saint Valentine.
The story says that Emperor Claudius II decided soldiers should not get married. Why? Because he believed single men fight better. (I really want to know who gave him that idea.)
Valentine said: “Nope.”
And he secretly married couples anyway.
Very romantic. Very brave....and hm...very risky.
The emperor found out. Valentine was arrested. And later executed.
Yes. Executed.
So basically… Valentine’s Day started with secret weddings and an execution.Not exactly candlelight dinner vibes.
Later, the Church made him a saint, and February 14 became Saint Valentine's Day.
Fast forward to the Middle Ages.
In England and France, people believed that February 14 was the day birds chose their partners.
Birds falling in love. Finally something sweet. Poets started writing about romance. People began sending love letters. That was cute and simple!
And then came printing machines.
And companies realized: “Oh wow… we can sell cards.”
And slowly, it became what we know today...
Hearts. Flowers. Chocolate. Pressure.
Money. Broken hearts. Crying if there is no gift. Yelling because someone forgot the date...
It is already so commercialized.
Maybe before I saw it differently. I’m not sure.
But after working with elderly people in a nursing home… I see love in a completely different way.
We have four couples there. All married more than 50 years. A few days ago, one couple celebrated 70 years of marriage. Just wow.
And they are still so in love. Walking hand in hand every day. And guess what?No Valentine’s gifts.
I once asked one couple why they don’t celebrate it.
They told me: “Why should we? We celebrate our anniversary. That is our special day. If I want flowers, I tell him. And he buys them.”
Simple. Real.
What love means to me?
My husband and I joke about Valentine’s Day. I tease him: “Did you buy me something?”
He says: “That’s why I bought you Lego flowers last year. They stay forever. You can look at them every day. Not only two days and then they die.” 😉
And you know what is more important for me?
When he brings me coffee in bed. That is love.
When we come home from work and he says: “Pick a movie. I’ll make popcorn.”
That is love.
Not because the calendar says 14.02 and suddenly you must prove something.
He shows me love every day.
No gifts needed.
Even words are sometimes not needed.
💔 The other side nobody talks about
In our nursing home, everything is decorated today. Hearts. Balloons. Chocolate. Even the dessert is heart-shaped.
And then I see residents sitting there… alone. Some lost their partners many years ago. Some have no children. No family.
Today one 97-year-old woman was very sad. I asked her why.
She said all the memories came back. She misses her husband so much. He died more than 20 years ago. Her children also passed away.
She said: “How can I be happy today when the person who loved me is not here?”
I told her she is not alone. She has us.
She answered: “You help me because it’s your job. My husband helped me because of love.”
That hit me hard.
So I quickly changed the subject. We talked about carnival, masks, donuts, party tomorrow. Something happy.
But still… I thought about it.
Valentine’s Day is beautiful for some people.
And painful for others.
So what do I think?
Don’t take this day too seriously.
Go to the store next week. Buy all the chocolate when it’s 50% off. Give it to your partner randomly.
That means more.
Because love is not about one day.
Love is coffee in bed.
Popcorn and movies.
Walking hand in hand after 70 years.
Not a commercial telling you when to care.
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