Get a Job!

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There comes a time in every teenager’s life when they realize that money does not magically appear in their bank account. That moment happened in my house when my teenager, clutching their phone in despair, announced, “I am literally broke.” I nodded sympathetically, as any wise parent would, and said, “You should get a job.”

Cue the dramatic gasp.

Act One: The Idea Stage
At first, my teenager entertained the thought of employment as if it were a reality show audition. “Maybe I’ll work at a bookstore. That seems chill.” Then, “What if I get paid to play video games?” Finally, after realizing the bookstore was not hiring and professional gaming requires actual skill, they settled on applying to the local fast-food place.

Act Two: The Application Process
This was a journey in itself. First, they had to find the online application, which required more effort than scrolling through TikTok. Then, they asked me, “What do I put for experience?” I helpfully suggested, “Professional snack eater and expert in ignoring mom’s requests.” They were not amused.

Act Three: The First Day
The big day arrived. Dressed in a uniform they claimed was “ruining their personal style,” they marched off to work. When they returned home, they collapsed on the couch as if they had just completed a marathon. “That was exhausting,” they groaned. “People are so rude.” Welcome to the real world, kid.

Despite the shock, they survived. They even cashed their first paycheck, which they immediately spent on overpriced sneakers and bubble tea. But hey, at least they learned the value of hard work. Kind of.

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