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Another Loss

dfinney

Published: 28 May 2024 › Updated: 28 May 2024Another Loss

Another Loss

Friday morning my family lost my Aunt Christine (dad’s youngest sister and my godmother) to glioblastoma, an aggressive and incurable brain cancer. Her death came just 14 months after her diagnosis.

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April 21st, 2024 - One of our last visits together. Pictured in this photo are my Uncle Mike, my Aunt Christine and their youngest son, my cousin Bob.

Friday was also my aunt and uncle’s 50th wedding anniversary.😢

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May 24th, 1974

Upon her initial diagnosis, my aunt underwent brain surgery to remove her tumor. This was followed by courses of radiation and chemo. I gifted my aunt a silver token for Christmas. One side of the token said “pocket hug”. Every chemo treatment, she would send me a photo of herself holding the pocket hug.

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Photo from Amazon: Pocket Hug - Always remember you are BRAVER than you believe, STRONGER than you seem, SMARTER than you think, and LOVED more than you know.

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Over the course of her illness, my aunt mostly lost her ability to speak and to read. She could still answer yes and no questions, but only with a nod. A couple of months ago, her medical team determined continued treatment would do more harm than good, and would no longer add longevity to her life.

We managed to get the siblings (my dad top right) all together one last time. They all came to see my mom when we found out her cancer was back.

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Uncle Robert, Dad, Aunt Christine and Aunt Susie.

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The same crew, decades earlier.

About two weeks or so ago, Aunt Christine really started to deteriorate. After an incident at home, Aunt Christine was admitted to the hospital. My cousin Mike flew in from Florida, and got here to Seattle last week. One of the last times my aunt smiled was when she saw Mike walk into her hospital room.

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Aunt Christine, her husband, and sons, just after Christmas.

On May 22nd my cousin Mike found an assisted living/nursing home facility willing to admit my aunt. It was only a few blocks from her home, and nurses there were qualified to administer her medications. She was transferred from the hospital to the facility on May 23rd. Upon her arrival, Aunt Christine was enrolled into hospice.

The hospice team conducted an assessment that afternoon. They determined my aunt only had 24-72 hours left until her passing. At this point she was already unconscious and no longer responding to squeezes of her hand. My cousin Mike let us know the news via a cousin text chain.

I texted my husband. He immediately came home. I tried to convince my dad to see my aunt that night. I said I would come watch mom (she is bedridden and also dying of cancer) so dad could be by my aunt’s side. Dad said he had too much to do that night, but we made plans for him to see my aunt the next morning.

Since I didn’t need to watch my mom, I made the 45 minute drive to the nursing home. I arrived around 7pm. My Aunt Christine of course was there as were her husband, her two sons, my other aunt, and my cousin Nicole. I stayed for 2 hours. It was nice to have that time to talk with my extended family and to hold my aunt’s hand. At 9pm I headed home, giving my Aunt Christine one last hug, kiss and “I love you” before leaving.

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Leaving the nursing home the night of May 23rd.

The next morning cousin Mike sent me a text at 7:22am. “If your dad can get here earlier, that would be better.* I immediately called my dad to tell him I was on my way, and that he needed to be ready to go. I left the house without showering or breakfast.

I walked in the door of my parent’s house at 8am. My dad was on the phone. His sister Susie was just telling him the news that my Aunt Christine had passed. She died while I was driving down. I am so sad my dad didn’t get to the nursing home to say goodbye.

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Dad and Aunt Christine, Christmas 2019.

The last few days have been weird. Lots of feelings. Sadness over my aunt. Anxiety that I know my mom’a time is coming. Comfort in seeing the signs of death in my aunt mirrored what happened to my grandma… which means maybe I know what to expect with my mom. Joy in spending time with my cousins. Longing for the good old days, when my family were all healthy and my grandparents were all alive.

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My Aunt Christine was filled with joy, youthful, kind, and incredibly intelligent. She graduated summa cum laude from university and was an avid reader throughout her lifetime. Her HUGE smile lit up her face, and her eyes always sparkled with cheer. She loved movies, wordle, board games, chocolate cake and baseball, but more than that, she loved us all so much. Aunt Christine especially loved her grandbabies… the human ones and the four legged ones. At only 71 years old… she deserved so much more time.

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Me and Aunt Christine over the years.

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I am grateful to have had such a kind and loving aunt. Growing up she only lived a couple blocks away, so I am grateful to have shared so much quality time. I am so glad she was able to hang on long enough to see my cousin Mike come home. I am thankful Aunt Christine was able to leave the hospital and pass away peacefully surrounded by the people who loved her most. I feel like she held on until the 24th just so she and my uncle could reach their 50th anniversary. It means so much for them to have that milestone.

I found this quote online about death.

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I hope Aunt Christine continues to hear our laughter and feel all of our love.

💔 dfinney


Funeral services will take place Wednesday, May 29th.

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