A Midnight Letter to Lost Love

Hello Midnight Letters members,

I wrote a letter to my lost love at midnight.

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In this twilight's lightless, cloud-covered hour, accept the greetings of a freshly bloomed gandharaj. Long ago, I wrote a letter to your address; today, I sit to write again. My wistful heart seems lost today in the sway of a melodious river’s waves. In its tinkling, exuberant flow, countless dreamy words of emotion have been swept away, and I know nothing of them.

These colorful memories, your love carried along, I keep in the pages of a story. They remain captive in the coffin of time. If our relationship ever deteriorates, we can live on with them. By the way, how are you, Kabita?

In this torrential rain today, by the drowned city or beside my anxious half-open window, you were supposed to be here. Where are you? I keep tallying each moment of exhausted waiting in the faded pages of my diary. It’s as if the heart’s fervent cries, lying within sighs, are being crushed under neon lights—from the city to the port, sometimes from one horizon to another. One day, it will rain in our courtyard, and like unbound birds, we will get drenched together. That day, that rain-soaked bliss will truly be ours.

Carrying a handful of colorful wishes, I wander all day from one place to another. Yet, it seems you have no time for me. The breeze carries traces of sorrow, and the paradise lying deep in my heart has perhaps drowned in hell. I was away from your city for many days. Upon returning, I thought you were still waiting for me, silent like the leaves of a tree. Resting my head on the chest of the falling afternoon, I haven’t said “I love you” in so long. Never mind that. The sun has set, calling forth the evening. I must go now. From the silent, submerged city, I absentmindedly pick a lotus. Suddenly, in a moment of distraction, you rested your head on my shoulder. Looking once more in the dream, I lost you. I slept again afterward, but you didn’t return.

Your eyes are like clear glass; what stirs in your heart for me is evident in them. You know, just as the white flowers fallen on the ground rejoice when picked up, I am even happier at the spark of your subtle smile. Anyway, causing me pain is also your right. In a whim, you get angry with me, and then darkness descends over my eyes too. Come back and wipe away that darkness with tender care. Today, like a bewildered wanderer, I examine these memories with endless melancholy. From far away, an unknown place, your smile beckons. Pray to Allah that we remain ours. Allah hafiz.

Yours,
A person who loves