For those who want an honest and realistic picture of pregnancy, birth and raising three kids, then take a look at my #pregnancydiary and feel free get in touch with any comments, questions or suggestions.

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A baby will be born when it's supposed to be born and doctors and midwives will advise on the best way to get baby out. However, it's worth having a birth plan to communicate to medical staff about the type of labour you wish to have and things you might want to avoid. Particularly because when labour begins, you may be out of it and feel like screaming at people instead of calmly communicating what you want. Birth plans don't always go to plan and that's ok. It's still better to have one than not.

Here are my birth plans for each child:

Baby No. 1 - March 2009

The Birth Plan

Have baby in birthing centre not hospital

No pain relief, I want everything to be as nature intended

My husband will be my birthing partner and will give me back massages through labour

Listen to relaxing music on CD

Use the birthing pool to manage pain and I want baby to be born in the pool

Skin to skin contact when baby is born

Husband to stay the night with me and baby in the luxurious double room

Go home the next day

What actually happened:

Waters broke at home which started off strong contractions

Went to birthing centre, midwives said I was only two centimetre dilated and sent me home

Couldn't cope with contractions so went back to birthing centre. They felt sorry for me so let me stay there

Spent 20 hours in the birthing centre pacing the room through my contractions and getting in and out of the pool

Husband attempted to give me a back massage, I told him to stop as it was annoying me

Told husband to switch off the CD as it was annoying me

Ended up sucking on gas and air like my life depended on it

Got to 9 centimetres dilated and midwives transferred me to hospital as everything was progressing slowly and baby's head was in a weird position

Got to hospital and demanded an epidural

Was given an epidural and put on a drip of hormones to speed up contractions

Was given countless internal examinations with doctors and midwives trying to
turn baby's head around from inside me

My parents assumed I was dying after being in labour for so long and rushed to the hospital

Was given the full dose of epidural and taken to theatre for possible c-section

Doctors asked me to attempt pushing one last time and dragged baby daughter out using forceps after giving me an episiotomy

Total length of labour was 36 hours

Skin to skin contact consisted of baby being placed on my chest for two seconds before taken away to be examined and cleaned

Had the shakes (side effect of epidural) and couldn't hold baby for over an hour

Husband tried to sleep in a chair next to my bed but was told to go home

Baby and I were given a dose of antibiotics because my waters broke over 24 hours before the birth. We had to stay in hospital for 3 days

Returned to hospital a few days later due to bits of the placenta being left inside me

Baby No. 2 - October 2010

The Birth Plan:

EPIDURAL!

What actually happened:

What I thought were Braxton Hicks contractions were actually real ones which got stronger after I had a "show" (the mucus plug which comes away from the neck of the womb)

Stayed at home for as long as possible and used a TENS machine (a machine which allows you to send electric currents to your muscles, this apparently takes your mind off contractions)

Was 5 to 6 cms dilated when I got to hospital so midwives told me to stay

Husband had to drop off our daughter to his sister so I was alone in a cubicle crying and sucking on gas and air while I waited for a delivery room to become available

Bro in law and sis in law came to sit with me in the cubicle and offer moral support

Parents came to stay at my place and look after elder daughter at night

Bro in law looked traumatised and made a swift exit as soon as hubby got back. Sis in law stayed for the whole thing and was a big help

Begged for an epidural

Was told I was doing really well and didn't need an epidural

Demanded epidural

Got an epidural

Had to lie on hospital bed due to epidural but could still feel contractions and knew when to push

Baby daughter was born after a 10 hour labour

Had skin to skin contact and breastfed straight after giving birth

Vaguely remember pushing out the placenta

Had to be stitched up as I tore along my episiotomy scar. Doctor shoved some painkillers up my butt. By this point I'd stopped caring

Went home the next day

Baby No. 3

The Birth Plan:

Phone birthing centre as soon as waters break/contractions start

Get bro in law to pick up kids, and get parents to come over to put them to bed at night.

Husband will be main birthing partner but phone little sis and sis in law to come along for extra support....the more the merrier

Stay at home for as long as possible - watch Season 3 of Orange is the New Black on Netflix to take mind of contractions

Check labour bag contents list, pack drinks and snacks

When contractions are regular and getting intense go to birthing centre

Try active birthing positions during contractions

Put music CDs on to help me relax

Use gas and air if needed

When pain gets unbearable and I start screaming for an epidural, it's time to enter the birthing pool

Skin to skin contact when baby is born

Wait until cord has stopped pulsating before cutting it

Let placenta come away in its own time.

Husband to stay over in the double room...might as well make the most of a night out together

Go home the next day

What happens next...

As you can see, I was in blissful ignorance the first around and that first birth experience ended up scarring me for life. It's the reason I lost confidence the second time around. Especially since the second time around was only 18 months later!

This time I want to try live the birthing centre dream again but be more realistic about it. I like the attention from midwives that you get in the birthing centre and the facilities are great. I'm going to try and give birth without an epidural this time. I've recently spoken to a lot of mums who have had positive natural birth experiences and been reading up on active births too. It's made me feel braver....that and the fact that a 5 year gap has put a rose tinted glow on everything! I'll let you know how it goes!

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MummyIP x