Challenge #03674-J021: If You Can Hear This...

"I will be honest with you. Pax Humanis is coming to haul you to court, your chances of escape are slim. What, they're sending a Humanis member that's a lucker? Turn yourself in, now, and spare yourself the pain. Your chances just became none." -- Fighting Fit

Humans are, possibly, the strangest Deathworlders known to intelligent life. Those weird little apes had a rough evolutionary path. They almost went extinct several times, and for at least one of those, it was self-induced.

As a species, they're completely bonkers. When confronted with a hazard, there are some who will be sensible an approach with caution. Some will run away from it and build increasingly ludicrous preventative measures to keep it away. Others, and this is the part that lead to the diagnosis - figure out how to use it for fun or profit. These are also the monkeys that used lead as an artificial sweetner even when they knew it was toxic. That's why the rest of the universe thinks they're crazy.

There's also a small pack of them hunting me down.

Hello. I'm a wanted criminal. And this transmission may as well be my death log. They've sent Pax Humanis after me.

Just to be clear, like those ancient Humans who sweetened their wine with lead... I knew what I was doing. The universe is a big place. They can't possibly monitor all of it, right?

Wrong.

All it takes is one slip. One lapse in security. One misplaced trust... and one cogniscent to report the violations in the Charter of Cogniscent Rights.

Violate those badly enough, and your best value is either meat or mass credit.

Yes, I made the balding monkeys work too many hours. They don't need that much sleep. Yes, I overcharged for basic facilities, but I had to balance out the cost of their upkeep. I needed to turn a profit on this venture. All this stuff about health and welfare's just a waste of time and money. They're tough monkeys. Everyone knows it.

And. Yes. I did use the small ones. But only in small spaces where they would fit. And I was benevolent enough to turn off the machinery when they were in there to remove the blockages.

Also, yes, the safety equipment was both cheap and not always up to the task. The monkeys are adaptable. They invent things. They were fine.

I had an overhead to think of. Investors to pay off.

I was in a hurry.

And... I have to confess. I'm in a hurry now.

You see... if you do enough things that are wrong, and you know they're wrong. After a warning to tighten up, they send Pax Humanis after you.

The most brutal, vicious, and vile monkeys they've got.

Many of whom extract their pound of flesh before delivering the rest of their target to the Alliance courts. Many of them take a dim view of people who use the small ones for industry.

Did you know? Some of these apes can alter the course of fate and chance? They're called Luckers. And some of those are in Pax Humanis too.

They're after me. Literally with luck on their side.

I only have one chance. To be faster than the Humans. And to stay being faster than them for... uh... the rest of my life.

[Photo by Casey Horner on Unsplash]

If you like my stories, please Check out my blog and Follow me. Or share them with your friends!

Send me a prompt [77 remaining prompts!]

Support me on Patreon / Buy me a Ko-fi

Check out the other stuff I'm selling