Oh for a carrot!

The wife works nights; she does Continental Shifts of three on and three off. When she is working and because I'm a very modern man, I cook dinner in the morning, generally at 5:00 am! So that the missus can have an extra hour in bed and there's a meal ready for when she gets up and I get home from work. Today it's a lovely chicken pie with new potatoes, greens, beans and... Oh no! There are no carrots!

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"Aha! I know if I walk Charlie, our dog, a little later. Hopefully, the fruit & veg shop up the town will be open; I say open; they'll be setting up, but selling me a bag of carrots shouldn't be a problem, should it?

Sure enough, the shop was getting ready for the day.

👨 "Hi there, I know you're not open yet, but I was wondering if you could sell me a bag of carrots?"

🥕 "We're not open yet."

👨 "I know, sorry for being cheeky, I was just hoping you had a bag I could buy. I'm not bothered about change if that helps?"

🥕 "I don't have any carrots bagged up; I only have loose."

👨 "Could I have four carrots for £1? You pick the carrots."

🥕 "The scales are not switched on yet."

It was time to admit defeat; she was clearly not going to sell me any carrots. I was tempted to bellow: "If only you hadn't thrown away the old weights and measures scales. You wouldn't have to wait for the damn thing to switch on!"