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dickturpin why?

dickturpin

Published: 04 Jun 2021 › Updated: 04 Jun 2021dickturpin why?

dickturpin why?

I used to work in the Hazardous Waste Recycling industry. Some of the chemicals we dealt with were pretty evil, not to mention deadly. One day the fire brigade rang. A fellow recycler (Competitor) had [supposedly] inadvertently offloaded some 45 Gallon drums containing liquid death (I forget the exact chemical now) at a local landfill site, and they needed to be removed and disposed of safely. As an honourable, decent, ethical salesperson, I rubbed my hands together and phoned the competitor.


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Me: "Hi Derek. So we need to organise this removal but before I despatch our guys. I wanted to advise you that this is not going to be cheap, and I don't want you to think that because the authorities have asked us to remove them and you have little to no choice that we're exploiting the situation [cough, snigger, cough, splutter]."

Derek: "Go on then, what are we looking at?"

Me: "Well, off the top of my head, about £35,000."

Derek: "HOW MUCH!?"

Me: "Well as you know, I'll have to send a team of Industrial Cleaners, then there's the lorry......"

Cutting across me

Derek: "AT LEAST DICK TURPIN WORE A MASK!" [Expletive removed]

And from that day on my colleagues started calling me Dick Turpin so the nickname kinda stuck.

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Linux/FOSS user & advocate. Podcaster. Well known for having outrageous views.

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