Dear Diary: I Am Already Breathless Once Again

My previous dialysis doesn't end well because for one thing my blood pressure crashed so I wasn't able to finish my session. My relatively less experienced nurses are too lazy to catch it and correct it so they just return my blood there by ending the session.

They also didn't took out much of my extra fluids so I was left out having an extra baggage in my body as extra fluid. That in turn puts a burden on my breathing and displaces my lung capacity adding the squeeze to my lungs hence my breathing problem.

So I am glad that somehow at rest I am not as breathless but when I start to move around I just can feel the misery because I am like a fish out of water gasping for air. My normal hemoglobin levels helps by not making me so exhausted otherwise I could have capitulated sooner.

Right now I just feeling frustrated that I cannot do the things that I am doing before like cooking, my hobbies, and even socializing, walking around, attending church, going to the town, meeting and hanging out with friend where most just flew away.

It is a life that I was not expecting but I have to still strive to make my life at least comfortable and hope that soon another miracle in my life could happen again so I am praying for that and asking others to think of me and pray for me too so that I could have many voices and chance for God to hear all my pleadings that I know are for my good.