Our first wedding

God, I was so nervous to attend this wedding with you.
I was so anxious.

But at least I could blame mid-August weather for me being sweaty, and not my crippling anxiety.

We were only dating for a few months at this point.

Going to a wedding so soon felt.... felt heavy.
Having to sit by your side during vowes of people I barely knew while still trying to learn about you ... felt heavy.

Being the perfect date
Ordering the right food
Drinking just enough wine
Telling the right jokes
Not spilling on myself
Dancing with your friends
Slow dancing with you

felt
...
heavy

Maybe, I over thunk every detail while it was happening.
Maybe, I have unrealistic expectations of how I should be.

but

You were the perfect date
You ordered the right food
You drank just enough wine
You told the right jokes
You did not spill anything
You danced with your friends
You slow danced with me

and it felt

peaceful